You may be finding yourself right now with no partner and copious amounts of free time. Now what? Instead of making sourdough bread or whatever, try the almost Lost Ancient Art of Masturbation Without a Vibrator. Now, not gonna lie, vibrators are the bomb. They get you where you need to go—fast. And with so many fantastic sex toy choices, from the legendary blunt instrument that is the wand vibrator to über-specific toys designed to mimic oral sex (what a world!), why should you change what’s working so well???
But maybe you’ve been hitting the wand too hard and need a little vibe detox. Maybe your beloved Rabbit is in its death throes. Maybe you need a non-buzzy option bc roommates. (Pssst: Here are some super-quiet options that won’t wake up your roommates.) Maybe “sex toys” are below “food” in this month’s pandemic budget.
We get it. Besides, knowing how to give yourself an orgasm where there’s no toy around is a just good life skill. Whether you are new to masturbating overall or have been hitting it for a while, masturbating without a vibrator is a great way to slowly explore what feels good to you and retrain your body to respond to different, subtler sensations. And being more responsive can translate into easier orgasms when you are with another human again.
Here are some ways to have your way with yourself. (And if you need more, see: 28 Ways to Ensure You Orgasm Every Time You Masturbate.)
1. The Faux F*ck
Miss the feeling of penetration? Squat over a pillow (how you doin’, pillow?) with one finger inside your vagina and the other hand rubbing your clit. You can thrust against your finger, tap gently on the upper wall of your V or press hard in the same spot. Take your time. You’ve got plenty.
2. The V Stroke
If clit stim is your thing, lube up your index and middle fingers, placing one on each side of your clit. Slide your fingers up and down on either side of your clit. That’s it. If you want to tart it up, press a finger just above the entrance to your vagina and tap or rub gently.
3. Mirror Selfie
It can be surprisingly hot to watch yourself in the throes. Pull a chair up to a mirror (lock the door first, checking again optional) and watch yourself as you stroke your body. Tease yourself a little. Pinch your nipples and see what happens. Drizzle some lube on your belly and watch it trickle between your legs. Damn, girl, you look good.
4. Sticky Fingers
Try something super simple by gently tapping your clit. Don’t use lube—a little bit of tackiness is your friend here. It may not do it for you right away, but keep at it, teasing yourself with starts and stops. Then put a dollop of lube on your clit and slowly swirl a finger around it. Don’t shift to more vigorous strokes, even if you really, really want to—your orgasm will unfold in a surprisingly powerful series of waves.
5. The Bath Bomb
If you have not had sex with water, get to it at once. And if you’re not blessed with a detachable showerhead, you can get down with the regular old faucet. Slide your ass waaay down so your V is angled conveniently under the stream. (Just test the water temp first!) Adjust the water pressure to your liking. Actual bath bomb optional.
6. The Threesome for One
If you’re down for a lil multitasking, this one’s for you! Use one hand to do whatever makes your clit happy. Use the other to curl your index finger up against the upper wall of your vagina and if you’re down to try it, your fully lubed pinkie up your bum. (Pro tip: If your hand gets crampy, a butt plug works wonders!)
7. The Convertible
Straddle a pillow, fill your hand with a long-lasting silicone lube, and run your fingers up and down your vulva, rubbing it in circles. Lower yourself and hump your slippery hand. Do you like the humping? The rubbing? Mix and match? This is valuable intel that will not only get you off but can also make sex with another person that much better too. Knowledge is power!
8. The Burlesque Bang
Most women cannot have an orgasm with penetration alone, but penetration can make an orgasm feel deeper and last longer. Invest in a dildo, ready to serve you whenever you damn well please. One to consider: The Mustang has a suction cup so you can turn any smooth surface into your personal sex space. Stick it to the seat of a chair, plop on down Cabaret-style, and ride it while stroking your clit. Ride until you can’t no more.
***
This article originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by the Cosmo.ph editors.
