Ah, yes, the eternal question: Is squirt actually just pee, or is it one of the hottest things that can happen during sex? Get ready to reject another form of binary thinking because, like so many sex things, the answer is somewhere in the middle.
When it comes to the ol’ “is it pee?” thing: “The answer is: yes and no,” says Gigi Engle, certified sex educator for 3Fun. But don’t worry—even if there is a little pee involved, that in no way diminishes the sexiness of squirting, okay?
But let’s backtrack. What does squirting even mean? “Squirting,” aka female ejaculation, is when a person with a vagina gushes fluid, usually during orgasm. Not everyone squirts, and not everyone does it in the same way. Some require penetration; others only experience it through clitoral stimulation. It’s just another sophisticated, perplexing, and absolutely pleasurable sexual experience some bodies can have. And yes, it can be messy, but since when is tidy sex hot?
It’s also important to know that it’s okay if you don’t squirt. Like loving anal or intense nipple stimulation, it’s just part of sex that applies to some people but not everyone. “Squirting is not a universal experience among people with vaginas. Some people may experience it occasionally or regularly, while others may never experience it at all,” says Dr. Laura Purdy, Chief Medical Officer at Wisp.
Maybe you’ve seen it in porn (in which case it was probably fake, FYI) or maybe you’ve actually experienced it. It doesn’t happen to all vagina-havers and it doesn’t happen all the time—so if you’re pretty sure you’ve had plenty of orgasms before and have never squirted, you can relax—but it is very much a thing!
Okay, but what exactly is that thing, and more importantly, is it pee? Again, it’s complicated. The shortest of short answers? Squirting comes from the urethra, Engle explains. So yeah, there’s probably at least a little pee in it. “That doesn’t mean that squirting is the same as peeing, though,” points out Laura Rose Halliday, founder and teacher at School of Squirt (where yes, you can take classes on learning how to squirt). While urination is the body’s way of getting rid of excess fluids, squirting happens during periods of great arousal or sexual climax.
“Squirting is ‘squirting’ because it is squirt; it happens during sexual activity,” says Engle. You’re not sitting down to pee, you’re squirting liquid during sexual stimulation. The point is, “Squirting is squirting and peeing is peeing. Both are natural things that happen to human bodies,” says Engle. “We should all stop being so worried about it and try to enjoy ourselves instead.”
Okay, now that we’ve got that little PSA out of the way, let’s unpack this wet and wild (and totally natural) thing some bodies can do.
Why all the confusion?
Despite millennia of evidence that squirting is a very real thing that happens to some women and people with vaginas during sex (see the receipts below), so much about it still remains a big fat question mark. Experts have yet to come to a consensus on how, when, or why squirting happens—and, most importantly, whether or not it’s actual pee that comes out.
“There's confusion because people don't understand female anatomy in general,” says Engle. “There's very little research on the topic; it's only now getting any rigorous scientific study.”
Meanwhile, the research that does exist on squirting is often, well, confusing. For starters, let’s take a 2013 study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine that estimates between 10 and 54 percent of women ejaculate fluid during sex. Okay, so either half of all people with vaginas do it…or almost none. Yeah, not helpful. There are a handful of other small, conflicting studies about the phenomenon, but doctors say way more specific research is needed, which makes it tricky to scream, “It’s pee!” or “STFU, it’s not pee!” at brunch with any kind of conviction.
But more recent scientific research at least offers insight into how common it is. According to a 2017 study, 69 percent of women between ages 18 and 39 experienced ejaculation during orgasm.
In addition to the is-it-pee debate, there’s also a lack of consensus on whether squirting is something anyone can learn to do or if it’s more like being able to come from penetration alone, which primarily depends on the distance between your clit and vaginal opening and only happens to some people. “Right now, there isn’t enough evidence to know if all people with vaginas can squirt,” Dr. Purdy says.
The thing is, though, the world really, really wants to understand it. Perhaps thanks to porn—in which vagina-havers are often seen shooting out streams of fluid during foreplay and intercourse—curiosity over this sexual feat has reached an all-time high. (Searches for “squirting” on Pornhub more than doubled between 2011 and 2017, and women are 44 percent more likely to look for this stuff than men.) Basically, it’s the Loch Ness monster of our sexuality: The less evidence there is about it, the more we want to know.
Okay, so is squirt pee or not?
Oz Harmanli, MD, chief of urogynecology and reconstructive pelvic surgery at Yale Medicine, has reviewed much of the research on squirting. His personal conclusion? The liquid is urine that can be mixed with some sort of female ejaculate. But mostly urine.
Let him explain: Squirts often contain something called prostate-specific antigen, a protein found in semen, which suggests that women do have the ability to cum sort of like guys do. Some experts say that protein comes from the Skene’s glands, aka the female prostate, located on either side of the urethra. But, he adds, “there is no gland or reservoir in the female body, other than the bladder, that can produce the amount of fluid that is released with squirting.”
“Squirting fluids undoubtedly contain elements of urine, like urea and creatinine. After all, they pass through the bladder before being ejected by the urethra,” Halliday adds. “However, squirting fluids also contain similar elements to semen (without the sperm). This means that squirting is a combination of different bodily fluids, one of which is urine.”
A 2015 study had seven women pee before sex. The researchers scanned their bladders both before and right after squirting. The results (of this admittedly small study) showed that participants’ bladders filled prior to squirting but were empty directly after. They concluded that squirting is likely the “involuntary emission of urine during sexual activity.” However, you should know that some folks who squirt consider this study problematic and incomplete, insisting that squirt is different from urine (which, as we’ve covered, it totally is—even if it does technically contain pee). So, once again, it’s not only complicated, but a very heated issue for some folks.
But essentially, squirt is most likely urine and secretions from the Skene’s glands. As Engle explains, it’s really all a matter of anatomy. “Anatomically speaking, people with vulvas all ejaculate from the same exact place through which they pee, likely ejecting some urine-like liquid out with their ejaculate.”
Is there more than one kind of squirting?
Not to add any more confusion to the mix, but there are actually *two* kinds of squirting that can occur: squirting through the Skene’s glands, and what we might call “gushing” squirt. It doesn’t really matter though, because—spoiler alert—they’re both (probably) still pee, as both are emitted through the urethra.
“Squirting fluids are often confused with female ejaculation, but they’re actually two different fluids. Squirt is an odorless, colorless fluid that is often forcefully ejected from the urethra. Female ejaculation is a milky substance that also comes from the urethra, though more often in a trickle,” Halliday says.
Engle concurs. “‘Squirting,’ or female ejaculation, has been thought to happen only when the Skene’s glands expel an alkaline, milky white fluid—usually in tandem with orgasm, but not always.” The Skene’s glands are located near the urethral sponge, and they only release about one to two tablespoons of liquid in total. “So if your partner is a big, fire-hydrant squirter, it’s coming from the bladder, not the Skene’s,” she explains.
That said, whether you’re squirting entirely through the Skene’s Glands—which Engle says is pretty unlikely given their proximity to the urethral sponge—or gushing from the bladder, “it makes very little sense that squirt wouldn’t have some pee in it."
Is squirting bad for you?
Nope! Generally speaking, squirting is just a cool thing your body might do when you’re having sex, and it’s totally normal. In some cases, however, squirting may be a sign of urinary incontinence or, more specifically, coital incontinence—aka the inability to control your bladder during penetration or orgasm.
While standard pee leaks are typically a thing older women might deal with (in addition to pregnant people), coital incontinence may affect 20 to 30 percent of women of all ages, says ob-gyn Heather Bartos, MD. And it can be tied to the status of your pelvic-floor muscles, adds ob-gyn Morgan West, DO. When those muscles are strong, you have max control—your bladder and urethra are on full lockdown mode, so nothing is coming out if and when you don’t want it to. But when they’re weak or, you know, relaxed at the tail end of an intense tantric sexathon, the muscles may not be able to withstand the power of your orgasm, setting up the perfect (rain)storm of squirt.
Um, so...time to freak out?
Nope. First of all, you should know that one study actually found that women who squirt during orgasm tend to have stronger pelvic floor muscles than those who don’t.
And regarding the pee debate, unless you or your partner are totally squeamish, squirting—and what exactly this love juice contains—is really NBD. Here’s a little secret: it doesn’t actually matter whether squirt is pee or not. Why? Because, as Engle puts it, “Either way, it's great, so everyone should just calm down about it. Pleasure is pleasure.”
Yes, you may need to clean up after an intense squirt sesh, but don’t let that kill your vibe. Halliday says the easiest way to keep clean is using a designated towel, sheet, or even one of those sex blankets they make for this exact purpose. Once you have the clean-up covered, you might even feel relaxed and more able to squirt as you come your face off.
“For many women, once the fear of ‘soiling’ things is gone, they’re actually able to let go of that mental block. And once you learn more about your body, you’ll likely begin to feel comfortable enough to explore squirting in cozier conditions,” Halliday says.
Most people find even just the idea of squirting incredibly hot. And honestly, if someone is making you nut so hard that you’re legit losing all control over your own body and its functions…who cares about a little mess?
And, at the end of the day, while pee makes some people think of toilets, public restrooms, port-o-potties, or other smelly and often unsanitary conditions, urine is already 91 to 96 percent water. While it’s not technically sterile (pee can contain bacteria—ask anyone who’s had a UTI!), getting some squirt that happens to contain a little pee on your skin, bed, or towel isn’t likely to cause any problems. With all due respect, you probably have bigger things to worry about, so relax and enjoy the squirt.
*This story originally appeared on Cosmopolitan.com. Minor edits have been made by Cosmo.ph editors.
